Classic Games: More Addictive?

Yes, its finally happened. I bought a few "old school" games online that i used to play yonks ago and having laid my hot little hands on them yesterday I proceeded to play "Pharoah" non-stop for around 5 hours.

Now fairly similar to when you leave a PC monitor on for too long without a screensaver, i believe I may now have images from Pharaoh burned into my retina. Oh well, I could think of worst things that could happen.

For some strange incoherant reason I don't seem to have the same enthusiasm for some of the new fleet of games. Classic though still seem to be highly addictive. games like Pharoah/Cleopatra, Warcraft II, Transport Tycoon and Starcraft just seem to be so more enjoyable to play than new games like Warcraft 3. Who the hell knows why. At least the old games are cheaper. Ahh the circle of life.

billycorgan.com

Howdy Howdy, Looks like Billy Corgan (as if you dont know who he is!) Has himself quite a cool little blogski Online! Really worth a read. Go Billy!

billycorgan.com

Geekdom: When is enough too much?

Was sitting here pondering whilst basking in the early morning light (it burns..arggggg) and contemplating what kindof "screen time: if you will i spend doing geek related stuff with computers, electronics, human cloning or blasting across the alkalai flats in a jet powered monkey navigated device of some kind.



And it dawned on me... I dont spend nearly as much time as I once did... is it possible i have had some sort of geek burnout, too much code and not enough human interaction. This is indeed a possibility. Maybe there is some sort of hard limit in my brain for how many total characters of code i can write before it just shuts down.



Who the hell knows! (or cares for that matter). My preemptive malcontent seems to have expanded (like a borg) assimilating all in its path. You will be assimilated.



I bid you adieu.

Computer Interaction: Natural or Just Plain Wrong

Well Im back! Did you go somewhere I hear you ask? Well as you might have guessed from the lack of excrement eminating from this vainglorious crucible I was on leave for a week! A week? Holy Batshit Batman thats insane! Me? Take Holidays? I know the very thought is somewhat laughable *ha ha* But its true.



But wait, there are even more startling revelations. I didnt touch a computer in almost 7 days! And from that little experience I have started thinking about human/computer interaction. Now its my time to digress on an inevitable tangent..



Feels somehow strange to be using a computer again..almost unnatural! I mean, after all are humans really designed to interface continually with computers. I mean after all, were computers around when we were designed (by god, aliens planting seeds on an infertile world, darwanism a.k.a "stinky monkeys" or just plain morphed from ameobas? The answer is no. Though, after all humans did design computers, but are the interfaces they provide merely the best possible interface, or just the cheapest and easiest?



Thinking more about this and all the possibilities, I wonder why the hell I should give a damn. This post is over. Exeunt.

Early Starts: Belated or Overrated

Here i am..its before 8am and Im at my console wondering what the hell im doing here. I mean hell, i could be sleeping right now. Then the thought occured to me.. Is it huma nly possible that I enjoy early starts?



Lets look at the cons. Noone is here for one, its quiet as well a crypt (not that im a subject matter expert on crypts - I digress) there is noone to bother me! The Latte sipping, buzzword slanging, voicemail leaving gang of project managers, business analysts and other miscreants are still sound asleep. Traffic is better thats for sure, and generally speaking I am as technically close to being awake and asleep at the same time. The general miscontent hasnt set in yet, and while im not overly happy to be here, its almost - bearable. Of course with the passing of the day it will hasten a growing lack of carefactor - but that is to be expected.



Meanwhile Im going to sit back, slowly savor my mocha caramel latte and stare into the abyss! Good day to you!

Rabid Diplomacy

How many times has someone pissed you off so much that you have thought you would just snap and go nuts - like for example smacking someone with a chair, defaming them in a very very public place or maybe sending around the moose for a little "one on one" time?



I really dont mind people that take offence, damn its your god given right. What I cannot stand is people that bottle up shit and just act like utter pricks until the end of time. Theres an old saying.. Build a F**king Bridge People! Acting like utter pricks sends my personal evaluation of your character down by at least 50 Shithead points.



Did I piss you off? Let me know. Kick me in the shins, call me a moron and get it off your chest. Honestly, is that so hard! Hell I would even settle for some good old retribution, revenge or whatever. Its all good!

Memories are Designed to Fade

While im on a tangent here I might as well post one of my original works from about 5 years ago now, written in that somewhat disenchanting period between University and Real Life (now theres an oxymoron).



Caught on the neverending train journies allowed my mind to wander into a somewhat decadent world of visions and dreams. Funnily enough this is where I penned most of my earliest work. Forgive the title - it has overtones from a Savage Garden song





I sit and stare, on a crowded train;

People pass me by, the empty stares.

A thousand faces all cloaked in secrecy.

A quiet rhythm of eternity, of absolution;

an endless parade of illogical perceptions and glances.

I feel alone, outcast;

set aside from the ebbs and flows of what is, what must surely be the world around me.



My mind wanders in ever widening arcs of my subconscious.

Resistance is futile, as my thoughts are
arraigned by the world of dreams and visions.

That’s where you come to me, your pristine image dances before my eyes. I cant turn away,

I cant speak.. I am caught, enthralled by your beauty;

I cant escape. The world around me slowly slips from view...



Your voice whispers sweet nothingness in my ears,

it fills my mind with images and draws me further from the world and into your arms.

Your face is etched in my mind, wherever I turn I see you.

I look into your eyes and lose all sense of reality, all the truths I have relied upon are
shattered with the honesty I see in your eyes.
So pure and true, I am swallowed by their beauty;
In a moment of passion, my lips meet yours.

Soft as velvet, sweet as nectar..


A moment in time, captured for all time.

Locked in the memories of those who shared the perfect moment. Images and thoughts raced
through my mind.

A moment of true perfection, my world was complete, was pure.

The troubles of the world passed away as we held each other close. It feels so good. So real;

I close my eyes...



Time passes.. perhaps a moment.. or an eternity.

I open my weary eyes and am thrust back to the world I longed so much to remain apart from.

I longed for the moment to come back, to rescue me from the dull existence in the merry go
round of the modern world.



I sit and contemplate. My thoughts are filled with you, and nothing else. Memories of the
perfect moment flood back to me..


I close my eyes once More, and pray that you will steal me into the world of dreams...



Copyright 1997 - Me!!

A Lighter Shade of Black

Today im in one of those moods. You know, the dark, brooding moods where apathy is your only friend. My carefactor is so low I became bored calculating the decimal points. And what does one do when they are in a dark mood? Read dark poetry of course.



Now in my former years I have written many poems (usually when Im in one of these moods actually) But today Im reading something different.. Its "Glass and the Machines of God". Its a story written by Billy Corgan, the ex-lead singer of the smashing pumpkins and Zwan and has overtones which have been derived from the "Machina - Machines of God" Album.



Here is an exerp: (Copyright- Billy Corgan)

Read the Whole Story Here




GLASS AND THE MACHINES OF GOD / a modern fable

somewhere in the not so distant future, we may find a world of not so
subtle torments...for amidst the rubble of urban decay and barren
wastelands find wander a billion shattered souls...disconnected from
themselves by impersonal technologies and personal cause...one such
soul is the center of our story, and his name is GLASS...he is the
lead singer of THE MACHINES OF GOD, and he believes that GOD itself
has asked him to try to change the world...this poses two simple
questions: “what is important in a place such as this? and is GLASS
a prophet sage or just someone who has gone quite mad indeed?!...

but first we must go back into the decadent swirl of the past to set
the stage for what is to come...you see, GLASS used to be named zero,
and the band the smashing pumpkins, at least until zero convinced the
band to change the name of the group...they were the biggest band in
the world, so this was a very courageous move to make...one day zero
had been alone in his house, quietly listening to the radio when a
voice began to speak slowly and clearly to him...it was the voice he
had heard in his head since he was a child, but now it spoke to him
thru the radio...this voice, which came to be known as the I OF THE
RADIO, told zero that his life was predestined, and in order to
fulfill his destiny he would need to devote his life to a much higher
calling, one that would look beyond the material trappings of the
occluded world...this epiphany that he was indeed important was a life
changing and soul shattering experience, giving him newfound
confidence and spiritual purpose...he finds sudden clarity in his
spirit, but can now see the utter shallowness of his real (and
particularly) public life...this sudden change causes many around him
to distrust where all of this is coming from...but his band stands
with him when he changes his name to GLASS and rechristens the band
the now aptly titled MACHINES OF GOD...

in his heart however, GLASS secretly questions why he has been
chosen...he is both enamoured and flattered by the idea, but at the
same time is innately resistant to the responsibilities that this will
bring...in his mind, god has aligned himself with GLASS, and GLASS has
aligned himself with god...a messenger he shall be, but is he just a
c.o.g. within another c.o.g. within another machine?...he decides to
use the instrument of his band to spread the truth of life and that
love and only love can be the answer...so our story begins with GLASS
AND THE MACHINES OF GOD at the height of their material powers, with
the most devoted fans in the world, and having just changed the name
of the band, releasing their new album, entitled MACHINA...

for years our hero has searched for his true love, the woman of his
dreams, JUNE...he called her by many names hoping that there somewhere
out there she waited for him too...so one night after a concert, he
saw her, and right then and there he knew he had finally found
her...JUNE was his perfect reflection, everything that he was
not...she brings to him the universal truths of life and living, and a
life he has never had... what he does not realize then is that he has
fallen in love with a reflection of himself...she embodies the
darkness he can only write about...she lives the life of flesh and
bone, one he can only think about...so for one short period of time,
our hero once zero feels complete and whole, with god and a woman by
his side...

GLASS finds himself increasingly torn between his new love and his
true calling as a messenger...he doesn’t realize that he really
doesn’t have to make a choice between the light and her darkness... he
tries to find balance between his humanity and his spiritual
pursuits...unknown to GLASS, the hedonism and electric energy of
GLASS’ accelerated world fuel JUNE's ever increasing secret drug
problems...GLASS comes home one night to find JUNE in a drugged haze,
a vinyl record hissing endlessly on the out groove...JUNE is so out of
it that she doesn't recognize GLASS at all, as he calls to her to come
back to him...the truth revealed, GLASS sits next to her and, in a
rare moment of candor, reveals that god has been speaking to him thru
the radio, knowing full well that JUNE probably won't remember the
conversation...despite that, GLASS reveals that he has doubts about
the validity of the messages and wonders if he is going insane...

GLASS decides because he loves her so, he will try to save her as he
is trying to save everyone else, with the power of his healing...GLASS
is now on a crusade to save everyone in his life; his band, his girl,
his audience, and consequently the world...the only problem is that he
has forgotten to save himself...

GLASS begins to lose his balance on both ends when he becomes over
righteous and indignant in his beliefs, alienating those who already
believe in him and turning off potential new converts...GLASS sees
himself as some sort of cosmic preacher, and if he just shouts loud
enough the message will somehow get thru the din...JUNE, finding the
solace and power in GLASS that she couldn’t muster on her own, begins
to believe that she does not need him anymore...she has taken her fill
from his light, and like so many others that have taken from GLASS,
question whether they ever needed him at all...GLASS begins to bitter
at the prospect that he is being toyed with and used by god and
JUNE... slowly, GLASS begins to lose faith in his seemingly
unshakeable beliefs...he becomes paranoid, believing that everyone is
out to get him...the new album is released and is not well received by
the fans or the general public...for the first time since the band
began, GLASS is publicly humiliated...he begins to question the
validity of the messages, thinking perhaps they are from a false god
or that his filters of perception are misaligned... he begins to
descend into madness, accusing JUNE of disloyalty...in one final
argument, she admits she never loved him at all, and that she did hear
him tell her about being spoken to by god, and that she believes he is
insane...she tells him goodbye for the last time and storms off into
the rainy night...she loses control of her car, and is killed when it
skids off the road...GLASS blames god for the loss of JUNE, idealizing
his time with her because he can not let go of what her vision means
to his faith...he blames the fans for their betrayal at not supporting
and following the bands new direction...inconsolable, and without
informing the MACHINES, GLASS impulsively tells an audience one night
that the band is going to break up and will only play one more final,
and sadly tragic show...



the night before the final concert, GLASS has a prophetic dream that
he is a soldier in a war...he wears a uniform, but does not know who
the enemy is or even what side he is fighting for...he wanders the
empty streets, gun in hand, looking for anyone at all...in a dark
starewell he meets a faceless soldier who takes him by the hand into a
dusky basement...the soldier does not speak, and together they sit
underneath a single hanging bulb...he is just an animal, seeking
shelter, warmth, food, and love...this dream, and the MACHINES final
concert send GLASS into a disturbing tailspin...he feels truly and
utterly alone...

after the final concert GLASS is quickly forgotten by the public, and
he takes to living in an empty warehouse away from anyone at all...he
has always felt alone, but now all of the things that gave him
strength, focus, and identity are gone...he faces his own doubt and
mortality for the first time...he begins to walk by himself at dawn
thru the waking streets, and slowly finds an inner peace with his
spirit...he begins to forgive and accept the things that have happened
to him, and understand that his desire to find perfection above his
own humanity led him to things that he did not really want or
need...he begins to love and empathize with others without fear of
consequence, and so in his aloneness realizes that he was never really
alone at all... GOD has always been with him, and always will be...and
so in this moment he fulfills his destiny, both for himself and for
GOD...

Powered By Kudos

I don't know about you, but as a Geek i find most of the time I do work not out of pleasure, or because I have to but to help out a mate and in turn receieve the most priceless gift - Kudos!



In light of this fact, and the fact that I had a bit of free time, an educational *cough cough* copy of Photoshop and an urge to create some crappulence that I developed my Patented (patent pending) "Powered By Kudos" T-Shirt!