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Deciphering Appliance Icons

I'm not talking about computer icons here - but the indecipherable icons used by appliance manufacturers the world over. Especially European appliance who tout their "design" excellence - which generally translates into the inability to use them. Hell they look good though.



Came in to work this morning feeling pretty chipper. Hell, its friday and I'm in a rare good mood. Saunter up to the coffee machine (one of those stainless steel automated euro thingamees - plastered with "Design Award 2009" Stickers - hell those awards were probably made up by the magnificent bastards in their marketing cesspool). I whack my cup on the machine - select the desired strength (one notch down from "Cornholio" Strength) - And hit the button (the give me coffee now button.



The machine does its usual clicking and whirring then stops - and some weird looking light starts blinking. It looks strangely like two amoebas duelling with salad forks while its snowing all around them. By now, my lack of coffee has dropped my mood from good - to moderate and I'm a little bit miffed. After several attempts at percussive maintenance (I smacked it around a couple of times at various angles) - I had to resort to reading the manual. Fuck - I really need a coffee. After 5 minutes of navigating through the various obscure languages - I find english. OK - so its out of beans. Ok, I can deal with that.



Thank god we have spare coffee otherwise I might have started looking for a shotgun at this point. OK, fill the pissy little compartment at the top of the machine with beans (damn they smell good) - its a grind called Cafe Exotica. With a sensual name like that it outa be good. But I digress. Ok - hit the "give me a fucking coffee now you stupid machine" button again..Whir Click Whir. More fucking lights!!!



The ameobas are still lit up like a little chrismas tree but now I have an exclamation mark. WTF. So I figure I fucked up with the beans somehow. Even though its like the simplest task in the world. More percussive maintenance, few attempts at swearing at it. No dice. Ok - back to the manual. Apparently, Amoebas and Exclamation mark means something far different. It means the little tray at the back that holds the coffee remains/corpses is full. At this point I'm suprised such a tray exists as I haven't emptied it in over a year. Oh well, first time for anything. I tip the disgusting contents out into the nearest recepticle. And try again.



FUCK! Ameobas are gone - the big mofo exclamation mark defiantly remains. At this point I am about ready to teach this machine a lesson. Sure its an ininimate object and can't feel pain - but I don't care. I need coffee, and this fucking piece of meta and euro shit is testing my patience.



Yet again I attempt to decipher to holy writings of the euro coffee maker gods. Ok - exclamation mark without duelling ameobas in a snowstorm means the water is empty. At this point I consider pehas adding something with a little more kick than water, as my day has rapidly deteriorated. I resist the urge, booze is best straight up anyhow (might clean the inner workings of the machine tho...wonder if thats in the service manual). I fill up the water..and press the "give me coffee or you will be smashed into a million pieces" button - huzzah! Success! Ah crap - milk is out of date. Fuck it - at this point I don't care.

Live Music

Theres nothing quite like it. I have been absent from this scene in recent years - I guess life just got in the way. Now I'm lucky to have the opportunity to see some of my favourite bands I have idolised since I was a youngster - live, in the flesh and better than ever.



Earlier this Year it was the Smashing Pumpkins. My all time favourite band. By far. I have seen the Pumpkins many times - from the '96 Mellon Collie Tour when I was still in high school - rocking the "Zero" Tshirt. To the '98 Adore Tour - picture billing corgan in a full length black vampire cape cranking out ava adore. When they broke up in 2000 - it was heart breaking. So to the false start with Zwan. So when they came back around - I had to go see them. The new lineup has the same energy and sound as the original - only Billy remains from the original 4. His voice is a strong as ever, and their new songs hark back to a pumpkins before Mellon Collie. The gig was the best I have ever seen. Intimate (by modern big band standards) - and my ears were ringing for 3 days afterwards. Rock on! My final memory was a 30 minute rendition of "gossamer". Long live the pumpkins! They are now releasing an 11 Disc compendium of their new tracks - one at a time via their web store - no record label - no bullshit. Just raw unadulterated pumpkins. Check them out @ www.smashingpumpkins.com and download the tracks for free!



Next - Its bon Jovi in December. I saw them back in '96 at Eastern Creek as a bright eyed bushy tailed youngster. It was the classic rock gig in a field. Including a violent hailstorm before the band came on. It was dirty, muddy and we all hurt like hell. But 3 hours (yes 3 hours) of Bon Jovi tunes made it all worthwhile!

Coming Soon

For a while I have been thinking about a bit of a venture on the side, and I have finally got around to making a start on it. Its a new business (yes another one!) will will focus essentially on all design facets (from web, print, architectural/landscaping), consultation and various IT related services.



It even has its first customer! A friend is coproducing a film based on a best selling Australian author and I will be involved in germinating an online presence. Very exciting. Looking forward to lending a hand to get a great Australian independent film heard!

Its name? Well the hue of this site is a big part of it. Thats all for now :)



Will share more information as it comes to hand.

I'm only happy when it rains...

Classic Garbage Song! I'm not sure what it is about rain that I love so much. The smell, the weight of the air around you, the sound and emotion. No matter how down I am, just standing and listening to the rain makes my soul feel whole again.



Of course the fact that you can't work or do much when its raining also helps.

Songs to Change Your Life #1

I've never really thought about a soundtrack for your life - theres just too many influences, phases and sheer bulk of music to deal with. I do however believe in a soundtrack for a day or a week of your life. Songs that you have in your head, songs that you think about or have been listening to ad-nausea.



So here is my first set of 10 tracks for this week.

1. Like a Stone - Audioslave


2. All I wanted - Paramore


3. 23 - Jimmy Eat World


4. Reoffender - Travis


5. Time Time of Times - Badly Drawn Boy


6. Dizzy - Jimmy Eat world


7. Always Love - Nada Surf


8. Light Years Away - Mozella


9. Feeling the Moment - Feeder


10. We Might as well be Strangers - Keane

Thoughts

When are your thoughts your own. When can you truly claim ownership and forsake the pressures and influences of others. Are we but a motley collection of random thoughts, feelings and desires. Or is there some deeper understanding of symmetry and archetypal design that is just too hard to comprehend. Some days I just don't know.

Try to understand men

"In every bit of honest writing in the world there is a base theme. Try to understand men, if you understand each other you will be kind to each other. Knowing a man well never leads to hate and nearly always leads to love. There are shorter means, many of them. There is writing promoting social change, writing punishing injustice, writing in celebration of heroism, but always that base theme. Try to understand each other."



– John Steinbeck

Down on the Upside

I only write when I'm sad or melancholy. At other times, I just don't have the words.



For me - happiness is like that feeling when you hear a really great band for the first time, or like a dream so good you can't bear to wake up from it. Afraid at any moment that it will be over. And if I talk, or write about it - somehow that threatens its very existence, or the permanence of its current incarnation.

The Power of Music

I love music. How a simple song can change your mood. How the right song can lift you up when your down, can give you hope or push you further into the abyss. How a simple song can encapsulate a range of emotions and memories into a single guitar riff, or combination of lyrics. I remember the first time I heard all my favourite songs, and I relive those memories every time that song plays.

I love how a song can make me sad, and at the same time lift your spirits.

Music is powerful. It is personal. It is a touchstone to our memories and a window to our soul. Music is what it is to be alive.

Do not look back...

"Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering." - Ida Scott Taylor

I love this quote. I like to think of this whenever my thoughts get mired in the past.

Struggling Against the Tide

Have you ever woken up one day and realise you have become the worst revision of your former self? That somehow all your weaknesses, transgressions, flaws and dislikable qualities have taken hold. That you have lost your way, and try as you might - the tide is too strong for you to swim against. Slowly your former self fades away to the horizon and your left with nothing but a fleeting recollection of who you used to be. The person you want to be. The person you wish with all your heart you are. But are you?



Do I struggle against the tide, or let it sweep me towards the inevitable. And if I do - what does that say about my heart, and my soul - as I would be betraying them both.

Mondays

Don't you love them. I'm in that brief 5 minute window where you think everything might just be ok. The weekend is still fresh in your mind, and somehow the week might just be one of those sparkling beacons that happen albeit occasionally. This will be the week!



Of course, give it five minutes and this wildly optimistic overview of the situation may change. However I choose to instead enjoy this brief window of respite. Ignorance is bliss.



As I sit here and sip my morning brew of exceptionally average instant coffee, and gaze out over the treetops from my quasi urban office window - I can't help but wish it was Friday.

Holy Shit - Its a Dinosaur

Eat your heart out Jurassic Park - I've got a bone fide fucking tyrannosaurus Rex living in my house - as witnessed by this photographic evidence! Sure some of you fucktards will claim that this dinosaur isn't real. Well to that I say - bah!

Australian Country Border Security

This ad by Toyota is utterly fantastic! A must watch.

Not So Merry Christmas

What is the deal with Christmas? Every January I see all these poor sloths come back from their christmas break and they dead set look like either that sat on a bicycle with no seat or their dog died (or perhaps both concurrently). So much for Christmas being the happiest time of the year.



I for one don't see why these crybabies are so sad.

• For starters - you get time off work. In what sick demented parallel universe could that be considered bad
  
  



• You get to eat copious amounts of food - especially meat. Bring on ye olde roast meats. Sure you might stack some pounds on, but what the hell. I'm sure jeebus wants us to eat lots of dead animals.
  
  



• Traffic is awesome - if you do have to go to work, its 100 times faster. Because all those stupid kids are at home bugging the shit out of their parents and not being ferried to school by soccer mums who apparently never really were able to get a grasp around the whole driving thang.
  
  



• You get presents. Need I say more. Better still, you can buy yourself shit like a big screen TV and claim it came from a jolly fat man in a red suit. Because lets face it - everyone else buys you crap anyway.
  
  

So buck up you crazy fuckers - and be happy, merry, or whatever the hell does it for you.

Shit, Where did 2009 go?

Fancy that - 2009 has come and gone. I almost managed to go an entire year without a post on here. Nice!
Ah well, when you don't have shit to say, you don't have shit to say. Kind of like this post I guess.

2010 is looking very promising with lots of new projects and things going on.

And who knows - maybe I will actually post some more this year.